What do all Indian parents have in common?
07.06.2025 14:15
Daughter : It is already done.I saw you exhausted and thought i would be a helping hand
Daughter leaves kitchem room. In evening, mother’s head is tight with migraine pain, and she shouts desperately in body ache again at daughter, ‘How hopeless children god has gifted me, don’t even I know, what sin I did in past birth that I got this daughter in this birth. Other women are so content, their daughters themselves take efforts to make their mums happy and share load of house works. And here she goes roaming ifol around house like a paying guest, you are reason to my aches, a bad girl really, how will god pardon such a disrespectful daughter idiot !!!.”
Daughter felt defeated
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But who made let her become a man dependnat wimpy lost kid.
Then one day, there arises a need for making a voter id card for daughter because elections are coming, the father of this girl with girl being around 24 yrs old had to go to various offices , and booths and meet officers and then understand new online procedure, etc. And has to take all troubles to know how to issue a new voting card for his daughter to be able to vote. He gets frustrated at level of hard work he has to do and tons of offices he has to visit to do enquiry and form submissions for his adult daughter to get her election id card, and counter scold this daughter on ‘I am so ashamed that you a wimp is my daughter who can’t even understand basics of how to gain simply a . Voter card? Your aged kids take all trouble, visit all places of booths and offices, fill forms online , make fee payment everything on own, and do not disturb parents for small problems faced in life ever. But you are a head ache. I wished I was infertile than becoming cursed with useless children like you guys who never let me go off in retirement phases of life to rest and chill , I always have to carry ur burden to feed u guys.
“No,wife do not hide anymore, I know these are dirty things, but our daughter has done more shameful by not helping you out in kitchen, so I will have to reveal your dirty problem, “ , “Listen daighter, now listen with ears open, your mom had bad period cramps and headache and was sleepy, couldn’t you understand and take her burden of share of cutting onions at least one afternoon ?”
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Daughter helplessly and desperately gets furious and answers back what had happened and mum again in desperation be like
“Don’t act innocent. I know all you ‘Today’s kids drama’, you might be foing drama of cutting so at a tortoise speed to impress me to grant you some wish huh? You today’s children have no respect and obligations for parents the way our gen had. If you were ‘Really interested in helping me’ and really cared about why I look sleepy, you could have asked out of worries the reason behind my weak body today and immediately pulled knife back from my hands even if I insist you to go to do homework you could have rebelled to save me from over exhaustion, you do raise voice for unnecessary arguments with mkm and dad, couldn’t you fight with me to not let me work too much beyond my ability and offer me to relax on bed!???’.
Mother : You never come ever like this before, huh ? Trying to throw impression !, Go no need to show fake drama, do some other homework. Go do geography, if it is done too, do english.
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Child is in 10th board exams, parents give same treatment of over pampering , over controlling and someetimes overbearing their child as if they would treat their newly Pregnant daughter in law. Like control on movements, choices, rest and hobbies to microcontrolling diet, food, exercise, which friends they interact with and whom they talks, where they sit to do self study etc. Like a haughty mother in law would micromanage a pregnant daughter in law or a lactating breastfeeding mama with extremem bias and control. Not because they care about what their child wants but in both cases they have a motive (which motive is actually related to the doer like a child who is appearing for exam or the pregnant woman who is soon going to have her child amd hence doer should have more autonomy over themselves but vice versa happens instead) for which to ‘Reach that motive these external third parties’ like parents and or in laws, ‘Enslave the child or prwgnant woman’ as just a ‘Trivial medium or Source’ to reach that goal, making them become haughty, controlling and unhealthily overbearing pressurising people instead of helping and supportive.
Daughter cuts remaining onions while mother is accidentally asleep in day out of extreme fatigue, mother suddenly gets up due to random bird noise and notice daughter cutting onions.
Dad joins his wife , “ Really disappointed with you gorl, I thought you were backbone here after ur mum to take care of house when she is ill. How can u be so ruthless to us, us who have you birth, how dare you ?”
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2. Daughter has found a very small stray puppy with milk whiskers orphaned with injured paws in her locality and wants to go to nearby vet to check it up. She is adult post 20 yrs of age pursuing post graduation course plus phd and already done her apprenticeship in a big company. And has own pocket money on digital wallet to spend when in need. Yet, her dad and mom would create a big emotional guilt tripping, raising voice and crying voiced blackmailing drama to stop her from taking poor puppy to nearby vet even in next alley. Saying “ Oohh come on, you are so small, u haven’t seen how to do tasks in outside world yet, what if they fool you and charge you unncecessary bills, what if you buy wrong tablets, what if you could not find right road to reach the dispensary, and what if you cannot carry the pup basket properly and pup bounces off basket and runs away , what if skmebody kidnaps you, what if you could not find way back home !!!!???? And suppose the girl had lived in a differemt state to study at a medical or nursing college herself 3 years before where she had to feed her ownselves, buy things in outside world on her own and care for ownself alone., Yet once back at home, her parents will emotionally guilt trip her to stay in 4 walls or only go with some parent accompanying or with permission and make her a man-dependant wimp, no matter her educational certificate iq level.
I don’t know any specific research or psychology behind the behaviour but it is as follows
But situation is opposite when child is only sitting for an exam, but the exam is seen as crucial by child, and not by his or her parents views. Example, a child is 22 nearing graduation, and attending online extra lectires for last important final year of degree course and wants to give a best performance, but parents traditionally only see borad exams as some seriousness amd physical clasroom lecture as something really beem taight would take online lecture and or class as a stupid unncessary one. They might order to the child to clean a table or two, or bring tea powder feom shopkeeper or bring stationary at middle of some class period, and kid should do it under parental obligations.
Mother : Get out of kitchen, why are you foing overacting of cutting without me telling ? Have I told you, wanna impress me ? , What do you want ??? Don’t eat my head, don’t mess around, get lost. Go do some homework
(Because periods are that level taboo as in medieval society that mom never talked she get it, when she is actually on period , or even her sanitary pads packs or any stained dress are nearly ‘Invisible’ from any body’s eye frame that nobody would know a menstruating woman exist in that family ever.)